A new year – the next move.

So its 2014 and I am trying to figure out my next “move”

Late 2013 I had asked people to help me win a competition to win a free feedback session with a Broadway casting director ‘Duncan Stewart’ and I was thrilled to have won the competition. For me this was a big win and someone at a “Broadway Level” would finally hear my voice and I would actually get feedback on everything from my Headshot, CV, Song Choice and Look. So in mid December I sent in all the above and received my feedback from Duncan. He gave me great feedback and amazing compliments on my CV, voice, song choice and look. He also gave me feedback on parts in my song which have been completely helpful to change. But finally the truth has come out to why I have been getting through rounds and rounds of auditions, yet never getting that call to be hired. All because on my CV I don't have GREENCARD PERMIT! For all international performers wanting to work in USA they prefer you to have a GREENCARD instead of a visa. Duncan continued to tell me stories that he has dealt with as a casting director and people have been stopped at the border because their Visa’s haven’t fully come through in time when contracts needed to start. So with that news in mind – I may have to look into obtaining a greencard. SO MUCH EASIER SAID THEN DONE!

So my next move or what am I still doing in the states? Have I given up, NO.
I am finding ways to strengthen my skills and I am still finding ways to use my skills in surrounding local areas. Yet I am also following another avenue of work I love. But all these “life decisions” that we make have really been stressing me out and I have had many nights lying in bed and my mind hasn’t shut off and which has made me go to sleep around 4 or 5am. But one thing that I am doing over here is growing in my spiritual walk with God. I have said in other blogs that I feel my reason to come to the states was not for performing and I am constantly reminded of this and the doors that have opened to other avenues have been amazing. I am now exploring other visas that let me work for a company over here for 2 years, yes it is exciting but nothing is guaranteed that I will get this visa. I have been (slowly) reading a book called Crazy Love by Francis Chan (for those who know me I don't enjoy reading, yet it’s something that I have changed since being over here) and it talks about all worrying and stressing about situations and I have also had some of my friends over here enlighten me with the same verse of scripture.

Worry: Implies that we don't quite trust that God is big enough to take care of what’s happening in our lives.
Stress: says that the things we are involved in are important enough to merit our impatience, our lack of GRACE toward others or our tight grip of control.

Proverbs 3:5-6  Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.

That is easy to read, but hard to do. We all think we know what’s best for our situation. A good friend pointed this out to me. ‘Nathan you followed God’s plan to another country, you packed up your life and moved across the world. You didn’t know when you were returning home, so why are you now stressing/worrying about the next move in your life.’ That for me was a massive turning point for how I am now looking at the future. I literally let God take my all and He has lead me and provided for me. Not once have I worried whilst I have been over here, yet why am I now worrying. It was a good reminder for me that I need to loosen the “grips” over my life and surrender my life to Him again. He will never lead us into a situation that HE ALREADY KNOWS we won’t be able to handle.

I am constantly growing in life, learning new things and travelling abroad and living abroad is teaching my culturally as well as spiritually. I have made awesome friends/family over here that when the time comes for me to return home (whenever that may be) it will be very hard to leave. Have I changed – YES. Is it a good change – YES.

So let me rephrase my opening line.

So its 2014 and I await my next “move”

.:My Grace is sufficient for You:.

Alot of things have been happening and as per usual, I haven't been able to update my blog fast enough.

As I have mentioned a few entries ago, I attend a small group on Tuesday and Thursday nights. It was brought to my attention in early November that I may wanna share my testimony in small group. I was like yeah that's fine. About a week later it was "Nathan what do you feel about sharing your testimony at Large group" (Friday night - Youth service approx 100 College students) I then was knocked back as it is something that I have never fully shared before. But I said yes - as I knew it had to be done.

So I agreed and began to write my testimony out. You know when God places something on your heart and you begin to work towards it - He provides. So in about 3 days I had written my testimony, read it to a few friends back home in Australia and felt ready as I ever would be. So I was then told  I would be sharing on the last Large Group of the semester, before everyone started their finals and then began they journey back homes for their Christmas break. NO PRESSURE!
   Well come the day, I began to stress alittle too much, but as I said earlier when God places something on your heart - He provides. I met with a friend before the service where we spoke about it and she prayed over me. I then had my small groups sitting 4 rows from the front in full support for me (which really helped settle the nerves) but then someone said to me. No one is going to judge - It's your journey, this is Your story of how God has worked.
  As a performer whenever we stand up in front of a crowd or people we are judged on what we look like, our talent. It is something that I have gotten used to over all the years. But this time I wasn't performing, I wasn't hiding behind a "character song" or a "monologue" - This was all ME. So the time came for me to share, my mate Jordan prayed over me before I began - which is where I felt the nerves disappear. I then opened up with some word differences between the Australian language and the American language and that again settled my nerves.
I then quoted the last line of a song and at the moment - I looked at the room of people in front of me and I thought, Why was I scared?? these are not just "people" these are FRIENDS. The amount of love and support that followed was crazy. Hearing how my story/my life has helped me in their last weeks of school, to thanks for reminding me to never give up. That stuff is crazy to hear and I give all glory back to God - who has continued to work in my life and through people who have impacted my life.

I will say it again, my move to the states - I thought it was for performing, yet how I am being changed. Don't get me wrong I am still aiming for that performing experience. Yet I am learning so much about myself, personal growth, spiritual growth & living in another country is remarkable. I count my blessings daily. I am so thankful to be able to experience this. 

Let it Snow

Well from the heading of this blog I think it will be quite easy to see what this is about!

So I heard that it was going to be snowing on Sunday (but that being said we were also told a week ago it was going to snow but never really did) as I was getting ready for church I thought I would wear my thicker/warmer jacket just in case. As I walked out of the apartment to the car I felt a little bit of snow fall on my face. Made me smile but that was about all I saw fall.

So I got in the car (this week my friend Jordan was driving) I always enjoy the drive to church its firstly such a beautiful drive around the woods & secondly the conversation is great all the time! We arrived at church and it just felt like a normal Sunday.
After church had finished Jordan said to me - "wait until we get outside Nathan it's snowing." I just began to smile and I just couldn't wait. So we then headed towards the car - and I stood outside and just was in amazement of how much snow there was.
  This is the first thing I saw when I walked out of church. It was stunning, breathtaking! At this stage I wasn't that cold - I think because I was just so excited to finally see it and to see if all still falling. We then walked to the car (very carefully - it was abit slippery) and began to remove the snow from all the windows so we could actually get in the car, to then begin our (what usually takes 20mins) journey home.
We began driving and at this stage the roads were slippery and we had seen some people spinning their wheels as they went up hills - so Jordan was extra cautious.
   What happened next shocked us all! So with a trip that usually takes 20mins - it took us 2.5 hours to get home and this is why! The first way we went we were trying to not go up all the big hills to save us from spinning out as well. We sat in traffic for approx 45mins (That pretty much was not moving) After some further investigation as we began our U Turn we believe their was an accident further up hence the traffic not moving. We began to take another route home and we were actually moving, we then decided that now was a good time to pray and be thankful for the safe journey thus far and to prayer for safety over the other cars and us as the snow was not slowing down.
      We were going so well until we hit another set of lights! We then sat here for another 30mins with out actually moving, so what do you do when you spend so much time in a car with friends? Well we did a devotion and then we played "Heads Up" by Ellen! It was very interesting to play this in the car but all 3 of us (Jordan, Kyle & I) were having fun. What was stopping the traffic this time was 2x 18 Wheeler trucks stuck and blocking the whole road on a hill. This is when we first saw a car go up the opposite side of the road and then mount the median and go in front of the trucks - another 3 cars did the same and then we were like well lets try it!  So we followed a line of cars who did the same thing & our little beast of a car made it and we were then moving and on our way. Here I am in the back smiling still putting my window down and taking photos as we continued driving.

   

Our next mission was going down a hill were on the left side were cars stuck in snow. We had people who were crossing on to our side of the road trying to get up the hill and get past those who were now stuck in the snow, yet whenever we braked our wheels spun out. So this is where i give kudos to Jordan and his awesome driving and one car got very close to us - yet Jordan knew how to handle it (here I am still in the back of the car smiling looking at these cars stuck in the snow)  We finally passed the above hill and began our journey again. We had one last hill before we were home straight! (This being said most of the time we were travelling at like 20mph) Yet this time we got almost to the top of the hill and began to spin out. So Kyle & I got out and pushed the car just until the wheels weren't spinning out! (again I was smiling as I was happy to be standing and walking in the snow) We then got back in the car and began the last part of the journey until we got home!

I have been told that Delaware has not had this level of snow fall in a long time - several years! Makes me smile even more as I have been praying for a white Christmas for some time haha!

Jordan & I then began our walk back to our apartments & the main street was full of snow! Jordan then taught me how to slide down the main street and that was alot of fun!    Later that afternoon I made a snow angel, went sledding down a mammoth hill - that had a jump, with some good & new friends (Spencer, Brendan, Jordan & Andrew) we also made snowballs and threw them around!  

I am very thankful for the protection that we had whilst driving home & the guidance that Jordan had whilst driving.
I am very thankful for my American friends for making memories with me and making my time over here so swell and always challenging me and blessing my life at the same time!
I am thankful for the snow, it really is a beautiful and breathtaking thing for me to see. It falls softly on your face as you walk or standing outside with you mouth open as it falls on your tongue - to it falling so beautifully on the trees and houses. It is something that I will forever remember and I just wake up and look out my window and smile at His beautiful creation.

   

THANKSGIVING

So its almost been 6 months since I left Australia and have been living in the USA. 3 months in Philly working for the best summer camp program out their  #JKCP & now 3 months living in Newark, Delaware.

I have had many awesome memories and experiences that I am so thankful for and I have had days and nights where homesick kicks in and there is not much you can do...yet my beautiful friends from Australia just know how to fix that! Over these past 6 months I have learnt so much about myself 

Thanksgiving was last week, pretty much all you do is EAT & sleep & then EAT.. then repeat the cycle. It was very good...but it got me thinking what am I thankful for. I began to write a list it. This is just a few things that I felt I needed to share.

Thankful for: safe travels
Thankful for: inspiring friendships
Thankful for: supportive family (even though my decisions are crazy sometimes)
Thankful for: a place to live
Thankful for: music
Thankful for: God's hand over my life and his continuing work 
Thankful for: smart decisions (some a risky but I am safe)
Thankful for: laughing & memories
Thankful for: this opportunity
         My list can go on and on. I am sure we have alot to be thankful for & I feel we need to share it more with others who have impacted our life. So what are you thankful for??

Blessed + Urban Promise

So my week has been going amazingly! I have had so many encouraging moments and everlasting memories with my friends over here in the USA!I have also received some awesome messages from friends in Australia. It means so much then you will ever know.        I sometimes think that its pretty crazy that I packed up most of my life and moved to another country - to follow my dreams! But I sit here in my room as I write this, thinking that I am very blessed and glad I followed God's calling.
I am blessed that I have a VERY supportive family that shows continued support from overseas.
I am blessed to have met friends over here who have challenged me, encouraged me and who continue to change my life.As I sit here trying to count all the blessings I have received this week and I am running out of hands/fingers to count them on.#blessed

 So this Saturday we had about 40 kids, 7-14 year olds come from Wilmington (nearby town) from a program called Urban Promise (http://www.urbanpromise.org/) The college christian program on campus Intervarsity organised to have college students meet up with the kids and we show the kids around campus, playing sports with the kids, Manhunt and then the college students bought kids meals for dinner and just got involved in these kids lives and showed them love. (thats the short version - now for the highlights and blessings)

So it began on Saturday at 11am we were split into the kids group and handed scavenger hunt clues. We walked around the campus finding buildings or asking random college students their names where they're from and what are they studying. To watch these kids faces light up as we walked around the campus looking at these massive buildings and seeing that they could go here when their older was priceless. The kids where hanging off us, linking arms or holding hands they were just super excited for the weekend and to spend time with us.

After lunch we got to play games with the younger kids out on the "turf". We played american football, soccer and frisbee. I spoke to some of the leaders, got to know them more and about this awesome program and the kids and where they are from. I also got to sit with a kid who had asthma and was unable to play too much sport which was awesome to hear him talk about what he wants to do when he is older. Whilst I was talking to the staff we saw a random college guy walk up and pass the football to a kid and the kid threw it back - he was shocked the kid could throw the ball so well - so he continued to play catch with him... The college student later walked off with his friends yet asked what the program was as he wants to get involved! That was super awesome to sit back and watch. I then had the extreme pleasure of walking all the kids into the building in one line - but doing "goofy" movements on the way whilst keeping quiet... this is one of those moments where its all for the kids. To see their smiles as we waved to college students, spun around and just looked foolish was awesome! To see their leaders also just have fun with them was an awesome encouragement.

So night time came quickly and we meet up with some more Intervarsity college students to get ready for the kids to come for dinner. We each got either 1,2,3 or even 4 kids and we bought them dinner, sat and had dinner with them! This within itself was so awesome. Listening to the kids ask us questions about our lives or what we do, to then listening to them and laughing with these kids - it was a great day with everyone from Urban Promise!

I will defiantly be making an appearance at Urban Promise in Wilmington as I know other college students will.
   I ask that if you read this to prayer for the Intervasity team that organised it this year and to prayer for the college students who witnessed and showed love to these kids.
I ask that you prayer for the team at Urban Promise, they do such great work with these kids and after talking with the staff, it is a struggle sometimes but it's something that they can not do with out a higher strength and love from God. They love their jobs and it truly shows.
   I also ask that you prayer for the kids at Urban Promise, you may not know them by name but they are full of life - Pray that they will learn more about God and that their passions and dreams to go to college, study and to learn will be available to them.

 These kids never stop smiling!!!  #blessed

WordsWorth - "Voice of the beautiful flower" Part 2

So the blog before this explained my time and the blessings I encountered whilst I sat in the room with those girls and heard their stories and dreams!      
   Well this blog is a follow on from that of how God is blessing me even more from this experience. 

So on Friday last week, Becca who helps run the program added me on Facebook and we began talking about the experience that I had and how I left that place a very different person. I then showed Becca my previous blog and she then shared my blog on her full website/blog of each week with these girls. ( http://voicesofbeautifulflowers.wordpress.com/) That was a blessing - just knowing that more people will be reading our experience, how our time there and my life has been changed within the 2 hours.

Becca then said that this Thursday they were having an event for the "Voice of Beautiful Flowers" (https://www.facebook.com/events/389856454477604/ ) and was wondering if I would like to sing at that. I said yes I would love to and then continued to explain that ever since I left the building on Tuesday I had a song stuck in my head and felt I needed to share that.So it is confirmed that this Thursday I will be singing approx 2 songs at a small coffee house that is promoting the girls and their book.

It's funny as I look back to when I was planning to move over here & I knew it was a Godly decision, I just thought that I would be doing musical theatre or something else. Little did I know that this awesome journey I am on would happen. #blessed
    I still get to perform yet I also get to witness to those through my speech and my voice and I believe that is the best performance as its from my heart, its real and it's worship.

WordsWorth - "Voice of the beautiful flower"

So usually I have small group on Tuesday night - yet tonight some of our small group went to a program called Wordsworth - "Voice of the Beautiful Flower" - I only knew I was going to be with a group of girls that are in a facility for kids who  struggle emotional, behavioral, health and in the welfare services, little did I know this group of girls would inspire and encourage my life.

So I shared this awesome journey with Kyle, Jordan & Katrina. We left Delaware and began our journey to Philadelphia. We asked questions about what we would be doing tonight with the girls and Katrina explained - tonight they are talking to the girls about college and what to look forward to and what the college life is like. So instantly I started freaking out inside thinking - oh I shouldn't have come, I don't even go to the college these girls are going to ask me questions and I would have no idea how to respond.
    (I should say that this program that we were going to has been running for 5years by Ms Em who has just devoted her time and has been a rock to these girls.)

So we arrived at the center, signed in and got to the room that had been saved for us and we were prepped on what usually happens and what the night will run like. Ms Em told us briefly about the program and how she gets the girls to write poetry as a positive influence on their life and to share their stories hence the "Voice of the beautiful flower" title . Next thing you know, in enter about 12 girls from the ages of 15-18, they hugged Ms Em and Becca and then said hello to us and shook our hands of even gave us hugs. Becca then introduced us to the girls and once they heard the "Aussie accent" that was them gone laughing and asking to record it haha made me laugh.
     Becca then showed the girls a quick slideshow and explained to the girls about what University of Delaware provides in programs and courses/degrees for the girls and what other colleges have and provide. The girls where excited and keen and asking questions about the campus life - it was awesome to see this light shine in their eyes.

Ms Em then asked us to introduce our-self and what we are studying and abit about our journey. With each introduction from Katrina, Kyle and Jordan the girls had questions in regards to their degree and life. My time came and this is pretty much how it rolled.
Hi im Nathan, 23 yrs old from Australia. I moved to the states to follow my passion and heart for performing! Baam the questions started coming in about Australia and my accent, then Ms Em and a few girls asked me to sing... I was taken back - so wasn't expecting to sing - had just finished a mouth full of popcorn. I then asked - do you know Stevie Wonder - they were like YES! So I sang 'Isn't she lovely'. It was taken well and more songs where then requested... yet it was time to meet the girls that sat in front of us and to hear their story and what they want to study.

We went around the room and one after the other these girls spoke of becoming a nurse, a lawyer, plastic surgeon, model, vet, performer and what colleges they want to attend and what their dreams are. It was inspiring to hear what these girls wanted, after having a tough life and dealing with more stuff then I think I could handle these girls wanted to get a good education and help others out in the world. To see the room full of girls faces light up when each of them spoke about their future was amazing.
    Ms Em then asked if any of the girls had brought in their poetry and wanted to read it. We heard words of hope, passion, hurt, truth and light - truly inspiring. Then Ms Em and one of the girls asked for one more song from me - so this time I asked the girl who wanted to be a performer to sing with me... she was super shy and wasn't up for it... I asked did she know Beyonce 'Halo' she said yes.. So I began the verse and by the end of the first verse she had joined in and I stopped and listened to this girl sing and fill the room with her beautiful voice. (In case you don't know music is a big part of my life, music gives hope, music heals, music calms) To see her face light up when she sang and to hear a room full of girls cheer and clap after she finished was priceless I will always remember that moment.

Some of the girls then went back to their floors and some stayed...we bonded with them they asked us questions about college and our life's and my budding performer came up to me again and we sang some more songs at the end of the night. Just as she inspired me I gave her some words of hope and encouragement. We left their soon after this, the girls hugged us, high 5's where exchanged and our life's were changed from that moment on. I do want to return again as these girls are truly inspiring.

For those that read this - May I ask that you pray for Ms Em and the work that she continues to work over these girls life's. She cant technically speak of God to these girls - yet some of them do ask about our background and beliefs which then creates an open door for that conversations. I ask you to also prayer for Becca and Katrina and the other people that enter these girls life's and just show love to these girls who don't always receive love. I also ask you to prayer for the girls, that their passion and dreams may come true, that there hearts will be soften and led to forgiving others who have hated upon their life. That these girls will become stronger and prepared to face the world when they do leave and continue on with life.

I only spent about 2hrs with them tonight and they have inspired me.

Here is a link to Becca's Blog - which is her experience and time spent with these girls week after week!
http://voicesofbeautifulflowers.wordpress.com/page/2/

The book of poetry written by the girls in the Wordsworth is soon to be published - "Voice of the Beautiful flower"